Wednesday, August 22, 2012


Jobs applied for: 58
Interviews: 0
Offers: 0

Sorry that I have not been very active in blogging these last couple of weeks. The stats above pretty much sum up my life the last several weeks. The official first day of school in this area is in five days. I've already seen yellow school buses driving by my house, more news stories are gearing up for the first day of school. Each day makes me more miserable.

I had the last four days off from work: When I first noticed this in the schedule weeks ago, I was elated because it would give me a wide enough window to accept interviews and/or prepare a classroom. I did manage to wash a ton of dishes needing to be washed and I got a couple of errands done on Monday, even paying over $350 dollars for two textbooks to use for a couple of math classes I am taking this fall. You better believe I felt a little more depressed after unloading that amount of money.

Applications for the Clinical Teaching Experience are going to be accepted in two weeks. Depending on whether I am granted a CTE, we still have to figure out how next spring is going to look. My husband doesn't want me to work during this time so I can be completely devoted to the CTE, but my part time job is the only thing that is giving us health benefits. The CTE will cost about $3000 out of pocket...

Words that have gotten me through today "One needs trials to have triumphs". Would this count as multiple trials or one big hairy trial?

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Bad fishing

I state this because I have had no bites on the job search. I'm so excited about a potential classroom, but because I am generalist, I do not even know which direction I would go if I little time to prepare a room. I'm already excited about joining another professional organization that relates to teaching in the digital age. Given where I currently work and my background in executing technology based trainings, teaching and technology go hand in hand.

So far today I applied for three different teaching positions at two school districts. I just have to keep on keeping on.

Please send prayers and thoughts our way as my husband is having to deal with uncertainty on the job front. He interviewed to teach students at one of the high schools in our hometown ISD, and found out yesterday that he won that spot, gaining a good number of students to teach privately next year. He has been holding out for a full time spot at the church he has worked at for over a year with part time hours. The new boss says that he values my husbands work but he will not budge on making him full time, even though he is filling in for a full time position that was supposedly filled over a month ago. He wants to and would rather continue with this music ministry, but with an increase of students in his studio to support his family which has no benefits and holding out for a full time church position with the music ministry which does have benefits...there is a lot of uncertainty where God wants us to go. At this point, it seems best to go for the route that takes care of his family more. I do not know what to tell him - if I knew, then I wouldn't be raving and ranting on this blog and searching for more fulfillment in my life.

It becomes ever more clear that my days with my company are coming to a close. Perhaps I am tired of doing lots of different things, but no acknowledgement comes my way but acknowledgement goes out everywhere else to others. Next week I know that I am doing at least five workshops over three days because no one else is comfortable in doing them. Less obscure is my theory of limited development coming my way, as they are sending other people through a development program (again) who may not be in the best interest of doing said job. Only a handful of people know where I am on my journey, and I know they are heartbroken when I mention that I have not heard about anything. I know that I have not gotten through all I have over the last 18 months to stop at this...but what else can I do right now that I'm not already doing?

Thursday, August 2, 2012

...tiny disturbances...

I have only received three form rejection letters from schools. My only ray of hope is that I applied to more positions from these ISDs, but I have not received any calls. Of course, these are school districts of whose policy I understand. For example, there are three band director positions with one of these school districts. This particular school district I have a good pulse on because my in-laws work in this school district. I already know that these positions have been filled as of this past Saturday. So I'm slightly surprised when one gets posted today, even though the position was filled a few days prior. They post the jobs as a courtesy, but it is sad because they could be missing out on some excellent prospects (not saying that those that are filling the positions are less than excellent!), but there is always the chance.

It is now August. It is miserable outside and where did July go to? Some schools start their new teacher academy next Monday, with most schools having their basic first Staff Development in two weeks. I have a schedule at my current position through then.

Realistically, I need to start considering the options of the student teaching option for next spring. If I recall correctly, Region 10 starts interviewing people for those spots in September. I am trying to keep busy, and with all the coursework I am completing for Region 10, plus taking TWO math classes at Collin, this should not be hard to accomplish. I am taking math classes to try to defer my student loan payments some more, as well as take advantage of a state grant that I qualify for, which I need to be enrolled in six hours to qualify. One of them is online, and the other only happens on Monday nights (so this would not be a major burden for retail hours).

I have applications throughout the major ISDs in the area, except for Dallas (and anyone in the teaching field probably knows why) and Frisco (because you have to know the right people on the inside and I also have just not had time to complete it). Although I think I would prefer teaching in a small town, one never knows when the elementary school just one block away might need someone to teach there (very wishful thinking).

I am trying to maintain this blog at least once a week, which now means not allowing ten days to lapse between posts. As I am not planning lessons or classroom layouts, there is not much else for me to do besides keeping up with my Region 10 coursework.

In other news, Hulu Plus now works on AppleTV and this equals very dangerous addictions impending. I am already into the tens with episodes of Once Upon a Time in less than 48 hours. Think of me :)

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Crickets chirping

Nothing of real interest to report at this time. I guess it would be more accurate to say that I cannot think too much about what is going on out there in the real world of teacher hiring because all I see is the steadfast decline of jobs on the teacher job network and no real "fresh meat" to work with now. I did finally get a very kind rejection letter from a school not too far from here. So I guess it is nice that they are receiving my application...yes?

...and of course that mere thought sparks my panic mode, because I have not received a rejection letter from other schools, perhaps there is still a chance??!? I should know better.

However, I am more ready now, I finally got a haircut yesterday (Tuesday) and even had my first experience with eyebrow eyebrows are still slightly sensitive from the journey. Perhaps it is better to feel like someone is scraping a multi-toothed fork across your brow, than to feel a soothing hot goop only to be quickly stunned by ripping pain. They say waxing decreases elasticity in your skin...and I might be willing to try the threading out again, but perhaps with someone else who doesn't hover over you and reminding you of all the other facial services she provides...and if I need my upper lip, I don't think so?

I even bought some clothes...and I'm trying not to feel guilty for spending money. This is especially so because I just had to buy some new hot rollers because the hot rollers that I have owned for years decided to up and disappear the one day, of a year or so, that I need them. If I had an interview after my haircut yesterday, I would have been super confident with the whole "throw my head back and let my locks fall into the right place" performance. Today was back to, "I'm hot and my hair is frizzed out, so hello again, elastic."

Right now I am waiting for some software to download and then to bed for an early wake-up. I need to find some tangible routine...

Monday, July 16, 2012


So I never received the feedback from the persons I should have received this feedback through. I went to someone else who was involved in the decision-making process, and this was good because he was confused as to what was said in my interview and to hear that something had changed. Well, things have a habit of changing when nothing is decided in over a month. He explained that I would have been chosen for one of the positions (there were two) but my availability was the breaking point (funny how I could hear part of me say "NOOOOO" when I explained where my career environment was changing and I said those words " what is best for the business..."

At least I now know that there was nothing else that I could have done better. The bad news is that I wonder how much my management team is willing to invest in me, as far as development opportunities, moving forward as I essentially placed an approximate expiration date on my time with this company. In a matter of two weeks, I will "officially" have been with this company for five years - I state "officially" because I was working shifts before my "actual hire date".

Now that I have some closure, I am ready to go full swing into landing an internship. So now I am swimming through the gut-wrenching tasks of creating cover letters and rewriting my resume to reflect my teaching experiences. This is so difficult.

My determination is only hindered by what happens if I get called for an interview? I feel like a frumpy mess and I am need of a serious haircut. My wardrobe has to transform practically overnight. But I have to fight back those feelings with the "you cannot win the lottery if you never play" mentality. I have come too far to even get to this point - I cannot disappoint myself.

Sunday, July 8, 2012

Hello July

...and hello heartache...and loss of motivation. But with the recent heartache, I was hoping to be even more motivated to get moving. Perhaps it is due to a lot of uncertainty and unanswered questions, and this is good as otherwise it would mean major disappointment/frustration.

Last Monday came and went, and I had heard nothing about the position I interviewed for at the END of May. Nobody knew anything it seemed, even a co-worker who has attained this position was wondering why my name was the only one showing up for trainings in a couple of weeks (lots of reasons for this, but nothing else was scheduled for anybody else). As I was working with one of the hiring managers for this position this last Friday, I (stupidly?) nonchalantly asked if they had come to a decision and he shook his head. Yesterday was the highlight of it all. I was helping a customer explore a webpage that the company provides for customers to schedule training sessions. I noticed another co-workers face along with other faces of trainers (this can only happen if a person is a trainer or fulfills trainings as a repair technician, and this face fit none of these roles). I mentioned it to her afterwards and she was like "Yes, I was told on Monday that I got it, but I'm not supposed to tell anyone until it is announced." We started talking a bit, because we're trying to figure out who the second spot went to, but then someone else joined in the conversation (at this point we are speaking as we don't know anything to keep it unknown until an announcement) and they said they heard there was only one spot being filled because the store could not support two, and then she mentioned how she hoped a person would not get the "Business" training position because of whatever reason. I am irked because there was no feedback given to me if there was only one position (others were being told "no") and all I hear is "we'll let you know". This has to be some of the most unprofessional practices that could go on in regards to hiring. I have placed some things on hold or just slowed down the process of it...but now I'm ready to go full steam and look at getting an internship (despite I will be scared to death with just a few days left before school starts to prepare if I am even hired).

I wish I had someone at work I could completely confide in, my husband has already dealt with some of the problems that can arise if the wrong person hears your concerns. As far as the other half goes, he has returned to his struggle of not knowing what to do with his life. He has some ideas and I know I am the same way (how many times over the last year have I flirted with the idea of getting into the biomedical industry or lab technology, but I have to stay true to the course that doors seem to keep opening for). I wish some doors (and windows) would shut and the true path that God has designed for him becomes a little more obvious. We both know how clear that vision from God appears, often clear as mud. I also wish we had friends that lived closer that we could spend time with. Our two good friends that lived in the area moved back to Austin this last week. How nice it would be to go back, but that cannot happen for quite sometime, at least 18 months from now or until I gain my teacher certification and my husband can either find work there or do enough networking that he can have there what he has here.

Whenever it seems that I am doing something right, I can usually have it confirmed when demons start appearing. Thoughts jump into my head that distract and confuse me and they have nothing to do with the good work I know He has in store for me. The devil expects me to either act on these thoughts or feel guilty about even thinking these things and then feel less worthy, but I know where I am based. I am seated in His Hands, and evil will not keep me from His Love.

I wonder if demons take on sinus infections, because I feel like another one is looming and that is also keeping me off the good pace I started last week off with. My Effective Teaching Practices class starts this week, so maybe that will light a fire under what needs to get moving.

Not motivated or not, this is a good time to do something productive.

Thursday, June 28, 2012

Next semi-chapter

***this entry is best viewed if your window is narrower, wider windows mess up the object wrapping below***

It has definitely been a mix of emotions over the last week, but mostly exciting emotions. The last week has been consumed with either driving in the area of my hometown and taking my daughter to the Houston Zoo, reading my current library book, trying to enroll in as many courses that I can for the Region 10 teaching program, or complete the assignments that are part of the introductory phase of this program (i.e. printing out notes, prepping a binder, scheduling my fingerprinting session...etc.).

The trip home was fun, albeit exhausting with all the driving there, to and from all the destinations we visited while there and of course the drive back. Little girl loved the zoo, although she threw her sunglasses into the trashcan which are now "lost" to her (my father bravely stuck his hand inside to rescue them, but to teach her a lesson, let her know they were gone - she will get them back as soon as she needs them and hopefully by then she'll know not to throw her sunglasses away). Mommy had to learn her hard lesson as well, as towards the end of the zoo trip, she noticed that her sunglasses went missing, the ones that were purchased just two days before, *sigh*.

Chilling with "MawMaw"

Posing with "PawPaw"
Despite it being such a very hot week in Texas the last few days, we had a nice time. At least it was not like our last trip to Six Flags when my sister had to be golf-carted to the First Aid Center because of heat exhaustion.

It was crowded this past Saturday, but my father does not get to travel to where we live whenever my mother and sister visit as he is often working. He was very glad to take a few hours to bond with his granddaughter.

The Region 10 whirlwind is going well - I have an Orientation tonight where hopefully things will finally settle in. The last few nights I have been working on the online modules that I have registered for as I only have six weeks to complete it - I'm hoping to have it done before then.

At work: I was pulled aside a couple of days ago to essentially get feedback from my interview. He said my interview was excellent, but he had to know about my availability. Since I knew I was accepted into the program, I felt I had to be honest about what to expect from me regarding availability - and I mentioned that in the best of likelihoods, they would be looking for another to fill my spot at the beginning of next year if I were to be chosen. I told him I understand that they have to make a decision that is best for the company. I really hope they appreciate my honesty and are willing to offer me the position knowing my latest news. They hope to have a final decision by Monday...I think admission of my long term goal may have sunk the short term goal - but I have to be true to myself. I'm just excited they are actually considering me after all the times before where they either did not interview me or gave me contradicting feedback.

At this point, I feel that there is so much to do, but I do not know what to do with myself at this exact moment. I am going to try to update at least once a week. Even if no one reads this, at least it helps me with my own sanity.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

...but not for long

I should have been checking my email before I went to work, instead of dealing with the calm but agonizing wait process. When I came home, I decided to check the website to see if the submission checklist had changed, not expecting to see anything else, but was shocked to see a different screen revealing the word acceptance and then the almost equal shock of paying a pretty hefty acceptance fee in my daze.

I was accepted into the program. Now the next whirlwind begins. Did I mention that God definitely has his hand in ALL of this? Here's why: All along I knew there was going to be an acceptance fee, and I just kind of had a tiny seed of strong faith that we would overcome it when we got to that point, if we ever got to that point. These last couple of weeks have given us a financial beating because Dear Husband has not been teaching lessons since school is out for the summer. So you can imagine the tiny plummet of my gut when I saw the acceptance fee, I thought I would have a few more days to contemplate that barrier. But did I mention this story - less than two months ago, we had to get our G3 serviced because of some stallings in the engine while driving, and in the end we had to pay close to $490 to get it repaired as it was something outside our warranty (and some yadda yadda about not getting is serviced at X miles, we have never had a new car, so servicing the car at x miles is foreign to us). Well, then we get notice (well, my in-laws get a notice, because it is in their name) that there is a recall on pretty much the parts that we had to get service on. So we try to get our money back...but we didn't take it in on time with the servicings and so are only entitled to $X amount. So my father-in-law, who has the check in his name anyways, decides to reason with them. They cannot come to an agreement, so the check stands at 3/5 of the original amount. Dad cashes the check, and then writes us a check...for exactly $500. We are so blessed by his generosity. This check was written out the same day I find out about being accepted, and that the amount to continue with the program is that exact figure.

But I know that He ransomed us for heaven, so why should I be surprised by this non-important amount that came on the wings of faith? Moments like this reaffirm that I am on His intended path, and I hope and pray that I do not go astray.

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

...and now we wait, again.

...but getting to this point has left me feeling...

I actually got her to say "Cheese!"

I received a text from the person who was holding the third and last recommendation form for the Teacher Preparation and Certification program. "I just sent it." are probably the happiest string of four words I saw today. Of course, I wasn't completely relieved until I saw that it had cleared TPC and its receipt was confirmed on their site. I got an extra little boost when the professor that had submitted the second recommendation sent a secondary response saying he gave me the highest commendation he could think of. God definitely knows the destination and puts the right people in our lives at the right times.

This step has passed, but now we wait for whether I will be accepted into the program. This should take 7-10 days, so hopefully and likely it will not be as much as a hair-pulling experience the last month has been with waiting for recommendations to become completed.

The rest of my day was not as productive as the morning, as in not getting more cleaning done. Little girl's clothes did get their deep washing - when I've had enough of the sighing over the stains that linger still after washing them, and get them soaking in hot water with the Oxi-clean and scrub scrub scrub. I even had to pull out the bleach on a couple of items. So they are in a regular laundry cycle. I keep forgetting that I need to pack, as the two of us will be traveling on Thursday. Husband must stay behind to finish out the musical and get paid.

On the technology front, I'm starting to realize that my six-year old MacBook is showing its age. Just trying to load the above picture, the hard drive had to do three passes to even acknowledge the folder. I will definitely be in the market for a new laptop this year, and although the new Retina Display MacBook Pros are nice, they are more than I will need. The MacBook Air updates are now better contenders to the MacBook Pros that I was primarily considering before last week's keynote. In about a month, I will be in a better position to realistically consider the purchase process and we can see where we are at.

Until next time...

Just one more

On my quest to get all of my requirements for application screening complete, I finally heard back yesterday from one of my professors that he would be happy to endorse me for this program. I submitted his information late last night, Region 10 sent it out around 8am, and the professor completed it before 9am. It is amazing what timely response can do for the spirit. I am now either waiting for one of the original references to submit her form, or for another professor to step out of the shadows and accept to recommend me.

Maybe I should consider one of my lab instructors as a possible reference?

As far as this morning has come along, I got the tires rotated and balanced as well as the oil changed and air filters replaced, all within an hour, and before 10am. Now that I've been home...I have spent an hour doing little, except start some research on air filters. I never seem to have the luck that when I must replace a filter or other seemingly unimportant auto part, my car always have the more "specialized" (i.e. expensive) component that never matches the price of the marquee list of services of the facility. It wasn't so rare that they had to run to an auto parts store. Afterwards, I was texting to my husband that I wonder if any cars use the listed $15 filter or if most cars are "special" like mine.

Now that it is 11am, I feel I must make the most of my day off and get things ready for when little girl and I leave for my old hometown on Thursday. I probably need to send a couple of emails regarding what is planned for this weekend. It is a bummer that I have to leave earlier than desired on Sunday in order to make it to a work meeting, but I will take what I can get.

Still no word on the other work-related game changer, as they are trying to get through another task before they decide. His Timing is perfect, I must always remember that.

Friday, June 15, 2012


Whenever I am going through a period of frustration, there is always a point where I start to notice things that re-ground me and remind me of the calm that is on its way. It can be the flight of two birds right in front of me as I drive, a butterfly that appears out of no where, glancing at a page of text and not really reading anything have a couple of words that pop out to me and reassure me that I am not lost. Tonight I start on a random website, which links to a blog, and the very top entry references James I:

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”

Persevere and know that He is there. Does He know my heart or what?

I was finally able to speak to someone at the teaching certification program. She said that it would be okay to change my references - that is who? After some thought, I decided to send an email to two professors that I had last semester, hoping they would be able to confirm my sanity, er, abilities in a potential classroom. My only concern is that I'm not sure they are teaching any summer courses, so they may not be able to respond to my inquiries. As for me, I was just proud of myself for actually following through on something I thought would be scary - for fear of receiving a negative response. Putting it into perspective "I never have to see these people again, so what is there really to lose?"

We'll see how that chapter turns out...

The last few nights I have gone to bed past midnight, but I want to try something out in the kitchen tomorrow. I finally received my ebleskiver (or aebleskiver, with both pronounced able-skeever) pan, and am looking forward to making something with it in the morning.

Let the drooling commence...
...there is also an ebleskiver recipe that will help me on my quest to make the best Panera bread four-cheese egg souffle likeness...I need to get the hang of turning the ebleskivers in the pan first before I take on that challenge.

Tuesday, June 12, 2012


This is not the week to contend with me. Everything is still up in the air and indecision is trying to sneak into my life at full force. It also doesn't help when the weekend I asked off some time ago is in jeopardy. First it was a meeting, and now it is a full day scheduled to work when it is even marked as a day off.

I was hoping that things would have moved along faster by now...this test is getting tough if it is a test of faith and patience.

We knew the summer would be a tough time financially, and that forecast is sadly coming to fruition. Too many other things to worry about, that I am not getting the chance to dwell too long on the issues mentioned in previous posts.

All I want to do is just nap...and avoid the issues.

Wednesday, June 6, 2012


Still waiting for things to fall into place to make things happen. But another kink was thrown into play. As I have not been accepted into a teacher preparation program as of yet, I have pretty much missed the coursework that I could have taken this month. I thought I would have missed the big series of classes in July as the registration deadline was initially on the last day of May, but I went online trying to sort out what classes I would have to take, and discovered that they moved the July classes registration deadline to July.

Yesterday while at work as I was breaking down all the equipment from my workshop, a manager casually inquired about my work availability. Noting I was not aware of the majority of my classes being wiped away for the month and knowing that I pretty much missed the ball for July - I pretty much recited my official availability that is on record. No Sundays...need to be off by x time in the afternoon on x and x weekday. I had to be non-committal on this - there will be a handful of Saturdays where I cannot work in the afternoon until x in the evening. For what I do now...this is workable. But did I mention that the manager is one that is a decision-maker for that work position I interviewed for last week? In this particular position, the primetime is in the morning and afternoon...including Saturdays. The fact that this manager asked this particular question pretty much signals that this could be a deal-breaker, or perhaps more of a sudden death round in this quest for the position I have been seeking for so long.

More and more, this is what I see forming for the next few months: If I am accepted, it will likely be too hectic/late/impossible/stressful to locate an internship as a teacher of record in a classroom starting in August. I could do the Clinical Teaching Experience, CTE, (alternative certification version of student teaching) but I would only do this if I remained PT at my current job as I would be in the classroom during the first half of the school year. I would probably not do this, because it would not be paid, and I actually have to pay around $3000 to do this (at least with the internship, the $3000 or so would be deducted monthly from the paycheck you receive as a teacher). So realistically it would look like me staying in my current job through yet another Black Friday and Holiday, allowing me to stockpile some funds so that I can complete the CTE during the Spring half of the school year, complete it with flying colors, and pass tests to become a fully certified teacher in time for finding a position for the next school year.

Of course, this all depends on getting the next big anticipated email/letter that says, "accepted".

Now to light some fires under some people's I can get closer to that word.

I know He is in charge, and overall I am not worried, but I just need to find peace in the anticipation and take this waiting time to acknowledge all of the blessings in just getting to this point.

Monday, June 4, 2012


This is exactly where I am right now. There is no metaphorical "ball" in my court, but I wish I could just get the other player to at least aim in the right direction. Here is where my life stands:

Sector A: Interview went well, the manager that attended the interview as well as the manager that would have been in the interview, but couldn't, commented on how impressed they were that I was so prepared. I brought it. I took it seriously because this is seriously what drives me to do many of the things that I want to do, both in the short and long term of my life. There are a couple more people they need to interview, so hopefully I will hear some feedback/results next week.

Sector T: All that I can submit has been submitted. They are waiting for two references. I just need to be extra persistent with one as they said they would get it done this past weekend. The other who I never see because they are at a different store, I have "nudged" them by sending them an email - because honestly, maybe they don't check that account and it's sitting in an overflowing inbox between shopping ads and newsletters.

In other news, today was an odd day at work. Granted, I was off for the last three days before today, but it was as though some of the wiring for the store became frayed today somehow. I caught wind of some news that three co-workers are off to greener pastures as well as heard some very unsettling news about the pitfalls of feedback. It also made me realize that retail is a system that is in ever need of repair and upkeep. One problem gets fixed, while another problem (usually something that was a problem before but was repaired) pops up. A co-worker of mine that no longer works in the same store definitely nailed it when she referred to it as "a vicious cycle". I remember she got so much flack for obviously flubbing on her words, but there was definite truth to her Freudian slip.

I have also come to a realization that my life is often too absorbed in many peoples' lives. My heart can only handle so much and also with campaign season upon us, there is only so much ad hominem and personal political wars that I can take before I completely give up on humanity. The problem is that I have not figured out how exactly to prune the exposure - FB is only so user-friendly, but fails at mass friendlist editing. My mind has twice courted the idea of deactivating my account there and just communicating with people via this site. I know that I would have some very unhappy family members if they could not keep up with my daughter.

All I can do now is to utilize the ignore feed on FB, maybe I can control what feedback I receive from the social network.

Tuesday, May 22, 2012


On Friday afternoon, after checking the site constantly after taking the test last Tuesday, I was sitting at a red light (shame on me, I shouldn't use my phone while behind the wheel) and I felt the urge to check again. A few red lights later I was able to see the word that was to help get things in motion. The score was pretty high in comparison to what I need to pass. The range of the passing score to the highest score was sixty points and I scored 34 points higher than the passing score.

This past weekend was going to be the prime "complete everything else" time. Little girl was recovering from her strep throat from two weeks ago, then husband fell ill Friday night and ended up going to urgent care the next morning with a diagnosis in the tune of URI. On Sunday, little girl was cranky (as she does when she is sick) in the morning, but her urgent care center would not open until noon, so I had to succeed at getting her to take a nap...and nap she did, for FIVE hours. After our five our nap, she was as chipper as she would have been at 7am that morning. Except that late Sunday, I started to feel the tinge of illness. Yesterday, at work, I felt awful all day with runny nose, sinus pressure headaches, bodyaches, chills...and came home that night to discover a very high fever, one that reminds me of the old "Say no to drugs" ads. You know the ones.

Doctor visit this morning assures me that I get the best of both of my cherished loved ones ailments. I have both strep and URI. My fever finally broke around noon, and I feel like a sweaty mess. If you sit in my chair afterwards, be assured I did not have an accident, it is just damp from all the sweat (I'm hoping all the toxins are being pushed out of my body).

Despite the fog and initial recovery, which finds me in coughing fits ending up in stomach cramps, I did get my application sent off as well as getting the change to stop by the bank to get a form notarized to send off with the materials they need from me.

My mother, sister, and aunt will be here on Friday...and the house is a wreck - I had anticipated that today and tomorrow would be clean up days since I am off work (and I should have known earlier in the month that these would be my recovery from illness days, because that usually happens when I have an anticipated and well planned day off) but I know I need rest to make it through the next couple of weeks...fraught with more anticipation (acceptance into the program?, wowing my current bosses in an interview for a position that I have sought for three years?)

But I can only worry about today...

Thursday, May 17, 2012


The title pretty much sums it up - my life right now is depending on the presence of one little word on a website that does not have the information needed to give that one little word. Passed. This past Tuesday I took the official first step into applying for an Alternative Certification program to gain my Teacher Certification. This test must be passed to even be accepted into an AltCert program. However, there are many other mini-hurdles to overcome to be accepted. If I planned out the courses that I have taken over the last year correctly, all the A's should help my last 60 hours very much. The next step would be financial - the summer is a pretty meager time for all of us, because my husband's private lesson studio dwindles as school is out, then add my part time hours of lovely Retail (I went part-time to really go all-out and attend school full-time these last two semesters)...Hello Ramen!

Also, a rare opportunity surfaced again at work, there is a full time Creative position, and hopefully I will get to interview for it in the next week or so. I know they are going to ask about school (which that leg of my long term plan is done, I hope) and what about my dream of teaching outside of work (which is a possibility, but the teaching market is still bruised). But if I could convince them that I am the right person, I could have some more stable routine in my retail work life, and not to mention full-time perks again. Yes, best case scenario, I would find an internship as a first year teacher starting in August...but that is still  some time away - and there are still so many things that must happen first.

Sweet girl is getting smarter and more gracious - she says "thank you", "Please"...and even "Bless You" after someone sneezes. She loves music, dancing, and Yo Gabba Gabba (which considering the formers, is no surprise). We continue to learn more about ourselves through her everyday, and I ache to provide her more. More love, more of my time, and more of the opportunities that I can only dream to give her.

...and to think maybe that whirlwind could start from a single anticipated word.

Thursday, April 12, 2012

Dusting off the cobwebs...

Well, for a little while at least. Just wanted to make sure I could even sign's amazing what one could forget in over a year. It has been over a year since my last post, but life does a lot of things to you.

I wanted to revisit, to try to be better at blogging more frequently, because there are some changes that are underway in my life. They are no where near being finalized for my comfort, but I have had some little hiccup barriers that could have made me lose hope, but God always finds a way for the good work one is destined to do.

Next week, I will start on some Field-Based Training, where I will observe some classrooms to fulfill my 30 hour requirement. My hiccup was that a lot of the schools stopped taking classroom observers at the beginning of last month, and this observation requirement was just discovered a couple of weeks ago at a meeting with Region 10.

There are still other things to combat, but I know I'm in good Hands. Now off to work for the evening!